RSS
 

Archive for the ‘Parenting’ Category

I wish you had read…

14 Sep

Today’s SITS Back to Blogging Challenge is to re-post something you wish more people had read.  To date, this is one of my favorite posts and I am not sure if anybody read it (well, except that one comment I got) or if they did, whether they “got” it.  So here we go again.  Tell me how you feel about it…love it, hate it, think I’m a horrible mom for having “favorites” among my children?  I need to know!

As moms, we’re not supposed to have a favorite child.  And I think it’s safe to say that most good moms don’t.  But a little old lady came up to me the other day and said something that made me reconsider my stance on favorites…she said that her family was like mine, 2 boys and then a girl.  She said that her daughter was her favorite, because she has a bond with her that she could never have with the boys.  I can certainly understand the bond part, but I think I lost her message in the “favorite” part.  Until I started thinking about this a little more…

My oldest son is my favorite because he was my first.  He made me a mother for the first time, something the other children will never be able to do.  He was my only child for almost 4 years, and for a long time we thought he would be an only child forever.  He’s handsome and articulate and smart and dramatic and there is nobody else like him in the world.  He has a beautiful personality and delights everyone he meets.  I could not ask for more!

But my second son is my favorite because he was long awaited and such a sweet little soul when he finally arrived.  He brought joy back into my life after I thought all hope was lost.  He gave me my much needed second chance at getting things right…having control over my birth, attempting (and succeeding at) breastfeeding again, and giving me the opportunity to enjoy being a mom rather than being terrified that everything I was doing was wrong.

And my daughter is my favorite because she was such a profound blessing.  I never expected to have another one and I really never thought I’d have a little girl.  I wanted to, but I wasn’t prepared to go through all of the injections and procedures again.  She has been an absolute delight and I never stop feeling incredibly grateful for her presence in my life.  She’s the one who made me feel complete for the first time in my life and she’s added the final piece to the puzzle of our family.

I had to admit to myself that I have favorites, too.  Perhaps not in the sense that one of my children is favored above all the others, but favorites nonetheless.  They are each different and I can’t wait to see what kind of people they grow up to be.  How lucky am I to be the mama to these 3 fabulous children?

Just re-reading this makes me cry.  I believe Violet was only about 6 months old at the time, so I could add much more to this now, but I’ll leave it.  It reminds me of how amazing and beautiful these kids are, something that I often need to be reminded of at the end of a long day of mommying, working, and studying.  What profound blessings they are, each in their own way.

And because this is an event that carries with it a super duper prize, I’m linking you up to Standards of Excellence, Westar Kitchen & Bath, and Florida Builder Appliances. I really want Thelma and Louise to come live with me and be my bestest friends!

 
1 Comment

Posted in Back to Blogging, Me Stuff, Parenting

 

Wild Wednesday

08 Sep

Just to give you an idea of what my Wednesdays look like for the rest of the semester, based on today’s events:

Up at 6:30am.  (Normal wake-up is between 8am and 9am.  Or 10am.  Or whenever I feel like it.)

Get ready…drink copious amounts of coffee.  Practice placing IV so I can have a continuous caffeine drip.

Leave house at 7:30am.

Leave oldest child at school on one end of town.

Detach suddenly very clingy middle child from leg and leave him at school on opposite end of town.

Go to my school, where youngest child screams as I get out of the car, making me feel guilty for trying to make something of myself.

Cry as my husband drives off with crying baby in backseat.

Kill 2 hours by “studying” while trying to ignore construction noise outside library.

Walk across campus while eating some granola.

Spend 3 hours looking into a microscope in lab.

Try to cram some pretzels and string cheese in my mouth while walking to class and trying to readjust my eyes.

Spend an hour and 15 minutes listening to very boring anatomy & physiology lecture, needing to pee the entire time because I chose to eat instead of go to the bathroom during my very short break.

Get picked up by husband and 2 youngest children who insist they did not miss me at all, despite the way they acted the last time I saw them.

Cry some more.

Realize that my blood sugar levels are dangerously low and suck down a soda.

Get heartburn that’s so painful I want to cry some more.

Oldest child gets home from school, insists on getting materials for homework project tonight despite it not being due for several more days.

He cries.

Everybody piles in car, goes to Dollar Tree.

They don’t have what we need.  All 3 children act like heathens the entire time we’re there.

Find alternate materials.

Have argument about dinner.

Give up and go out to eat because it’s not worth the fight.

Children continue to be atrocious during dinner.

Come home, everyone gets disciplined for bad behavior and I snap and send them all to bed early.

Cry some more.

Attempt more studying, give up and watch bad Netflix movie instead.

Whine and complain about hellish day on blog.

Go to bed at 11:30, thankful that Wednesdays happen only once a week.

 
No Comments

Posted in Back to School, Family, Me Stuff, Parenting

 

Lifting the Fog

02 Sep

I am awash in personal drama that has me in a terrible fog.  The nausea continues, though I know I’m not pregnant.  I have no idea what is causing it, but it really, really sucks.  It is constant and incredibly annoying.  And I just feel generally not quite right…little headaches, falling asleep when I shouldn’t, sudden weight gain, and emotional…I suspect it’s nothing more than stress, but it’s incredibly frustrating.

Then there’s my computer…it is, I believe, dead.  I manage to grab my husband’s a few times a day, but not for long and I never manage to get the things done that I intend to do.  I can boot my computer and open a program.  I can even use it for a few minutes, but then it locks up or sends me to the blue screen of death.  I have decided that upgrading the RAM is my last resort and that costs money we don’t have.  My printer isn’t working anymore, either.  I think it needs ink, but can’t afford that either.  (And if you’ve sent me an email and I didn’t reply, I missed it.  There are 73 new emails in my box and I hate trying to wade through them on my phone.  Send me a text if it’s important…)

And the money thing is always there…can I afford to buy shampoo this week?  What about toilet paper?  Oh, and don’t forget that there is a shut-off notice for the electricity sitting on your desk.  Better get that paid.  The good news is that I finally convinced my husband that we can no longer afford the satellite bill.  We had run out of all of our “special offers” and the price jumped way back up and they wouldn’t go back down.  So we shut it off.  I’m having some minor withdrawal, but am glad to have one less monthly expense.

And the beginning of the semester is always a little fog-inducing.  Moreso with the drama over the class and pre-requisites.  I’m overwhelmed at how far behind I already feel.  I need to type up my notes and study for lab quizzes and do homework assignments, all of which are impossible to do when the kids are up, and I’m too mentally exhausted to do once they’re down.

Speaking of kids, I feel like I have 500, not 3.  One in school already, one about to start.  They need to be on opposite sides of town, with drop off and pick up at the same time.  How will we manage this on the weeks that we can only afford to put gas in 1 car?  The logistics alone make me want to cry, especially since pick-up needs to happen while I’m supposed to be in class on Mondays and Wednesdays!  I have no idea how we’re going to make this work, but I guess we will somehow.  And once I’m home alone with just one child, how is that going to affect my day?  Will I have less time to spend on other stuff, or more?  One less child to deal with, but the one that’s left is all alone.  Anxious to see how that will work!  (Really, if anyone has experienced this, fill me in…is having only 1 more work than having 2?)

I want, no I need, to run but can’t fit it in.  It’s too hot at the time of day that I can manage it and I’m too tired to do it when it’s cool enough.  I suspect this would do wonders for my overall state of mind and I hope the weather cools down soon so I can do it.

Crap, my computer time is up.  I swear, number one on my list of things to do is buy some RAM.  And pray that fixes the problem…

 
No Comments

Posted in Couch to 5K, Family, Me Stuff, Parenting, Rambling

 

Goodbye to Babies

26 Aug

Quit growing up!!!  My oldest son is now a second grader.  In his bedtime prayers last night, he thanked God for his new teachers.  He said they were the best teachers yet and then also thanked Him for all of his other teachers, who he remembered by name.  He comes in from school, does his homework without being asked, and buys gifts for his brother and sister with his own money. He isn’t what I would call a little boy anymore…he is firmly in big boy territory and will soon be a tween.  I’m not ready for this at all.

Quit growing up!!!  My middle child will be starting full-time preschool next week.  In his prayers, he thanks God for his mommy and daddy and brother and sister.  It makes me want to cry, it’s so sweet.  He loves to be rough and tumble and has a great imagination.  He has a superhero hand and a mean hand and that mean hand is soooooooooooooo mean, but the superhero hand does things like hold his sister’s hand when we’re walking somewhere.  This time next year, he’ll be halfway through his first quarter of kindergarten.  Where does the time go?

Quit growing up!!!  My baby girl, my tiny little pink bundle, is now walking and talking and so not a baby any more.  She throws tantrums the likes of which I’ve never seen.  She likes clothes and shoes and hats and dragons and trucks and cars.  She stands up for herself when necessary and never plays the shrinking violet role.  If I’m home at bedtime, she climbs into my lap and begs for her “nuh” but if I’m out, she snuggles on the couch with her daddy and they are both snoring by the time I get home.  She sleeps in a toddler bed and says “night-night” and makes kissing noises at me when I lay her down for a nap.  She no longer needs me for food or comfort.  I don’t know how to deal with that.

Every day takes them one day closer to the day they’ll leave for college, get married, have kids of their own.  And further and further away from the days when all they needed was me.  I want to stop time or change my mind about the whole “no more babies” rule.  But I can’t.  So I watch them start their slow walk away from me and I smile…because I believe that I’m raising them well and with the love they deserve.  These amazing kids will be amazing adults someday and I’ll know then, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that I did a good job with them.

 
1 Comment

Posted in Family, Parenting

 

I Know You Do

14 Aug

Just a few minutes ago, I tucked my 4 year old son into my bed with a movie so he could have some quiet time.  (What I’m praying for is a nice, long nap…the other 2 are already down.)  I leaned over and kissed him, then whispered “I love you.”

His reply?

“I know you do.”

Wow.  I must be doing something right!  It is a powerful thing to know that you are loved.  I’m so happy I’m giving that gift to my children.  Can you imagine how beautiful this world would be if everyone knew, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that someone loved them?  I know I don’t do everything right…I mess up, a lot.  But they know they are loved.  Score one for the mama.

 
1 Comment

Posted in Parenting

 
« Older Entries
Newer Entries »