He seems to be improving. I took him into school yesterday to drop something off and his teacher was shocked at how sick he is…said she never would have thought anything was wrong when he was there Monday. So I feel marginally better about not being worried from the beginning. He really didn’t appear that sick!
And with that statement, I feel like I need to clarify what I said about finding a new pediatrician. I do not fault them for missing it at the first appointment. It happens! Gosh, she said she *still* couldn’t hear it even when she knew it was there. I’m the mom and I had no clue he was so sick. Yeah, he had a fever that wouldn’t go away and was vomiting, but other than some very out of character behavior it presented like a typical stomach bug. Couple that with the fact that some of my husband’s workmates had something that was very similar earlier this week (including the weird symptom of legs that hurt) and it never occurred to *me* that it was anything more. So I am not necessarily upset about that fact. As I said, this episode was the last straw in a string of bad experiences there.
When we first moved to Sanford and I was looking for a pediatrician, I didn’t have a lot of time. Within the 1st month we were here, my oldest experienced some bad asthma symptoms and my neighbor recommended her ped to me. They were on our insurance, so I tried them out. No complaints, so we stuck with them. I had a baby due in a matter of months and I just didn’t have the time or energy to look around. There were 4 doctors there and we really liked 3 of them. They were all very supportive during the difficult days early on with my youngest and took great care of us. I loved that I was never once told to supplement with formula, even though he lost over a pound in the early days and took almost a month to get back to birth weight. We felt supported in our decisions on vaccination and everything else we did (or didn’t do!) that is probably unusual in this area. They listened to my concerns when I got worried about his head shape and made the referral to get his helmet. They diagnosed my oldest’s SID and referred him to OT which has been a Godsend. I felt like we’d found a great practice.
And then the 3 doctors we loved left the practice. They were replaced, but it doesn’t feel the same. I was told I should wean my toddler because he’s too skinny. Never mind that he puts away twice as much food as his older brother. Never mind that it was January, and cold and flu season was just starting to kick into high gear. Never mind that my other child (who was almost 100% formula fed) is super skinny, too and we’ve never been able to put any weight on him. Or that my husband and I were the same way as children. No, it couldn’t be genetics. Trust me, I’d like nothing more than to wean him. But the middle of winter was not the time to do that! I’m glad I didn’t…he ended up with the flu but because he was still nursing, he didn’t get it nearly as bad as the rest of us. And he’s avoided most of the bugs that his big brother brought home with him. I 100% believe that it’s because I continued to nurse him throughout the winter.
And then there’s the way the nurse treated my oldest this week. They had to do some unpleasant tests while they ruled out various things, one of which was a nasal swab. I’ve had that nasal swab, and it freaking hurts. It’s incredibly unpleasant. She *laughed* at him when he screamed about it. LAUGHED AT HIM. It took every bit of self control I possess to not go mama bear on her. I’m getting angry again just thinking about it. This is a 5 year old child. You just stuck a big Q tip up his nose and rooted around in it. I think he’s got a right to be unhappy about it! And then when she had to give him his antibiotic shots, it had to be given in 2 doses. One in each leg. In other pediatric practices we’ve been in, they have gotten 2 nurses so that they could be given simultaneously if we had to get 2 at once, whether it’s vaccinations or whatever. I asked if this could be done and was told that it couldn’t. She did the first one (with much screaming and crying from my son) and then hit a blood vessel with the 2nd, so he had to get stuck again. I know it happens, but the trauma could have been minimized if we’d tried to do the first two simultaneously. Or maybe even tried using lidocaine or something to minimize the pain. *Anything* to make it a little easier. And I’ve since found out that rocephin is incredibly painful anyway. Had I known, I might have insisted on a little topical lidocaine or some EMLA to reduce the pain.
Considering I’ve heard from multiple people that they’re no longer happy with this practice, I feel like it’s just time to make the change. I’m not sure I can even get my oldest to walk into that building again…and if he refused, I’m not sure I’d blame him. My intent here is not to convince others to do the same, which is why I’m not naming names. I have no interest in badmouthing them here. They did take care of his physical needs, and that is what’s most important for me in a doctor. He is going to be OK so I cannot fault them medically. But if we can find a good option where the emotional wellbeing of the patient is just as critical to everyone who is involved in his care, then that’s all the better. I guess I’m just trying to process it all and get it out because it’s eating me up. I have a bad case of the “shouldas” and I hate feeling this way. Even worse is seeing the look of fear on my child’s face anytime we mention going to a doctor. I need to get my regular KUB xray done to look for kidney stones and when I mentioned it to my husband, my oldest looked absolutely terrified. I want him to trust his medical providers and he’s lost that now. Hopefully with a new office we can build that back up.
